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Good afternoon, Marcelka.
So, how did it go today?
Fine, except for Ozzak's tardiness.
Well, you know Ozzak, half an hour here, half an hour there.
This time it's 7 hours and 34 minutes.
Wow, a new record.
Did you forget those 14 days back in March?
Well, the Jezevec had premium lager days.
Tomas, good that you're here, I'm in a terrible rush.
Could you stay here until closing, I need to get changed, otherwise I won't make it.
Zoran is taking me to an important Croatian social event today.
Yeah, but I already promised Iva we'd go to the movies today.
What's playing?
Some quality film, so it'll be four hours long and not much talking.
I envy you.
I couldn't get Zoran to a movie theater.
He's always at work.
He only takes me out when Hajduk Split is playing in Prague.
Right, they're actually playing Sparta today.
I last saw Zoran in July when Hajduk played Banik.
And when they win, Zoran's in great form.
Don't get your hopes up, Sparta's in great form too.
Don't worry, Zoran sponsors them.
Hajduk?
Sparta.
I have to run.
Of course.
Well, Ivushka will have to understand, but it's fine, I'll just watch the Hajduk Split game on TV at home tonight.
You're a sweetheart.
Bye, girls.
Bye.
Father, where are you going again?
Ozzak still hasn't shown up, so I have to stay here until closing.
I'm really sorry, girls, I was really looking forward to it.
No way.
I won't let you embarrass us at the parent-teacher meeting again, like when you refused to pay 120 crowns for The Big Feast.
How was I supposed to know it was a movie?
Everyone knows that, unless they're a cultural primitive.
Old Voracek didn't know either.
Yeah, but at least he kept quiet and didn't yell "then what are we paying for lunches for?"
And what about the shop?
I already woke Ozzak up.
He'll be here any minute.
You were watching teleshopping all night again.
Sorry, bro, but those new TV shopping shows are pretty gripping.
I had to wait and see if someone bought the mole repeller.
Tomorrow you're opening the shop, even if I have to drag you out of bed myself.
So what are we actually going to see?
All About My Mother.
Uncle, don't you want to come with us?
Thanks, I appreciate everything.
Let Lexa go.
Why can't he?
I don't blame him.
Knowing everything about a mother.
Not even if they paid me.
But it's not about Simona, Uncle.
Going to movies about someone else's mother seems totally nuts.
Jesus, you're an even bigger barbarian than Dad.
Have you even seen Empties?
I see those every day.
The only thing he wanted to see was Kamenak, because he thought it'd be about the Stones.
It gets even worse.
Yeah, disgusting stuff.
Has he ever even seen a normal film?
Hmm, once.
The Mummy Returns.
How did you know?
Are they gone yet?
First they wanted to see a movie about Simona and then they picked a complete stranger's mother.
So nobody's home at your place now?
Nope.
Want to go bowling again with empty beer bottles?
No, I've got something better.
Full bottles.
Even better than that.
I got this special film.
Movies bore me.
I mean, you nap for an hour or wait in line for beer and come back, and you've lost the plot.
But this is a totally different kind of movie, it's...
It's...
An adult film?
You know those kinds of movies?
Not much plot, lots of girls, not much clothing?
What?
This?
Lexa, are you crazy?
Don't you know these movies cause deafness and dry up your spinal fluid?
My grandma used to say that too, Uncle.
But this is Barunka's Garden, and it's got that legendary love scene in Grandmother's Valley.
If Voracek sees it before me, I'll be the last person at the Jezevec who hasn't seen it.
Right.
Fine, I'll watch with you as a chaperone.
But if I see your spinal fluid drying up, I'm turning it off.
I'll go get it then.
I've got it hidden in a secret spot.
Can I borrow the keys to your cellar?
So, miss, where is it, let me take a look at it?
Go ahead, spread it open.
Well, I wouldn't have expected that.
Ah, right here.
Excuse me, my dress fell off.
Well, I'll start with you then.
Fast-forward this.
I want to know if he fixes the TV.
I bet it's the cable.
That's a long one though.
Lexa, you don't like this?
What do you think of it?
It's like with booze.
If I'm not doing it myself, it's no fun.
Yeah, but nobody will serve me yet.
I get it.
I was eleven once too.
And right after the miller left her, the dark huntsman arrived.
Mr. Ozzak, come, come, the Grandmother's Valley scene is on now.
Yes, in the cottage it's always lively.
Awesome.
Sultan, make room.
Woof, woof.
Good doggy.
Mom?
Hey girls, thanks for taking me along.
All About My Mother.
Who would have thought it'd be so interesting?
Hi.
Too bad you guys couldn't see it too.
Ozzak, guess what, the main character's father was a woman.
I really didn't see that coming.
See, and you didn't even want to go, right?
They showed beautifully how having a family secret can destroy a person.
How important it is to communicate and not bottle up your feelings, right?
What?
And you'll definitely have an edge over old Voracek now.
He'll be stunned at the parent-teacher meeting.
I'm just not sure, girls, whether some scenes weren't too risque.
Well...
We didn't even hear the risque scenes anyway, right?
Sorry.
Why do you do that?
Plug your ears and sing.
We're lucky they didn't kick us out.
It's a reflex.
If you had Lexa for a brother.
Yeah, yeah.
Movies can really awaken emotions in a person.
See, Lexa, this is much better than your disgusting stuff.
Yeah.
What disgusting stuff?
What's wrong, Lexa?
We have a problem.
I didn't want to tell you, but...
Lexa's spinal fluid has probably dried up.
I was just about to start treating him.
Ozzak, what happened here?
I honestly have no idea.
Lexa, what's wrong?
Maybe it'd help if he also expressed his feelings.
He should also see All About My Mother.
No, no, no, please, not that again!
Lexa!
Sasha!
Ozzak, please, can you explain what's going on here, what happened?
His spinal fluid hasn't dried up, well that's great!
What were you doing here?
We were watching a movie too.
And given that Lexa is running and talking, I'd say it was a pretty successful cultural evening.
You were watching a movie?
Yeah.
I finally saw the kind that aren't complicated.
Great, so next time you can go with Dad.
Or we could rent something.
I'd rather pop down to the cellar.
Well, in any case...
Maybe we'll have to stay here forever.
They'll hardly find us on this deserted island.
Yes, just the two of us and my ten girlfriends.
And we only brought two bikinis.
What is this?
We'll try to start a new tribe here.
A new tribe.
That never would've occurred to me.
Well, excellent.
I didn't expect you'd be up and about this early.
But bro, we shouldn't be afraid to express our feelings.
So I commend you for taking getting up for work so seriously.
Yeah, thanks.
Now I'm going to lie down because I'm completely dead.
No, no, no, no, don't try that on me.
That's not happening.
You're opening the shop and that's that.
So, Ozzak, you two aren't speaking?
Because of last night?
Maybe it wasn't her?
It could've been some woman who looks exactly the same as Mom.
That's stupid, isn't it?
Never mind.
Thanks then.
Bye.
Hello.
Why so glum, Lexa?
Because of last night.
You saw that horror too?
Of course, Zoran too.
Didn't see much of it, but all of Prague did.
So even Voracek already knows.
See, Mr. Ozzak, it is possible.
Getting up for work in the morning.
And I had to chant along with everyone else.
My throat still hurts today and it was all for nothing.
Hajduk lost, Zoran was furious and was ripping up chunks of turf.
Now he's lying at home on the Croatian flag, crying.
You're like a different person today.
It's been ages since I had such a nice chat with you.
Did something happen to you yesterday?
I watched movies.
I thought movies weren't exactly your cup of beer.
Ah.
Although there were certain scenes I had to fast-forward through.
Classic Bergman.
I had no idea, my God, you're interested in this too?
I've got a whole bunch here.
Everyone lent me something yesterday.
Show me.
This is wonderful, all Bergman.
I don't even know some of these titles, like Deep Throat.
And that one's really outstanding.
But your friend isn't very careful.
Such a beautiful collection and so many errors in the titles, like here.
Fanny and Alexander instead of Fanny and Alexander.
Or here, instead of Cries and Whispers it says Whispers and Squirts.
That sounds like it's about firefighters.
Is it about firefighters?
Mr. Ozzak, could you lend me something to watch at home, maybe those Whispers?
Sure, no problem, folks, I've already seen it anyway.
I'll try to convince Zoran to watch it with me.
Maybe it'll cheer him up.
I'd believe that.
But watch out for the dried-up spinal fluid.
Damn it, I'm all splashed, I had no idea.
Hello, miss.
So where do you have it?
What should I look at?
Marcelka!
So how was last night?
How did Zoran handle getting thrashed by Madera?
He didn't.
He acted like you when we lost to Turkey.
Turf and flag?
But you're in a great mood today.
It's the movie from yesterday.
I have no idea why I stopped going to the movies.
It completely captivated me.
I wanted to ask, would you like to go sometime too?
But you'll probably have to comfort Zoran, right?
Well, fortunately your brother lent me a quality film to take home.
Ozzak?
He never even finished How the Mole Got His Trousers.
Hold on, I may have actually seen something like that.
Bro, are you confusing it with teleshopping?
You think?
Tomas, don't underestimate your brother.
We've already been discussing this here.
Ozzak watches Bergman at night.
My brother Ozzak?
Clearly you don't know everything about your brother.
And why didn't you ever hint at this to me?
We could've gone to the movies together.
Hey, I'm going to see Sex and the City today.
That's probably too commercial for a Bergman admirer.
Of course, plus I've already seen it.
Even the sequels set in the countryside.
Maybe you could even learn from him.
Perhaps he'll lend you something from his collection?
I...
I usually fall asleep during art films.
A barbarian and an ignoramus.
Your brother and I prefer higher-quality productions.
No unnecessary talking, emotions expressed through body language, humanity laid completely bare.
Practically the whole time.
Completely bare.
Hey, Ivushka.
Hi.
So, are we going to the movies again?
Ivushka, today I'm going alone.
It's too commercial, you know, Sex and the City.
But we want to see it too.
Absolutely not, plus it's restricted.
It isn't.
And it should be.
As a parent, I need to see it first.
You can read magazines with Sasha.
You unexpectedly get invited to a party.
What do you wear?
A: Something cool and comfortable.
B: Lexa, where have you been all day?
If Mom notices that stuff, you're in big trouble.
Lend me the keys to the attic.
Sure.
I dry my panties in the bathroom anyway.
They're on the rack.
Lexa, you have to sleep in the attic?
You were using Mom's razor again.
No, nothing happened.
It's just too hot at home.
Then open a window.
No, I can't, because then it'd be too cold.
Lexa, you're weirder than usual.
Did something happen to you?
No, nothing happened.
What would happen?
I just didn't go to school, wandered along the river, and now I'm going to sleep in the attic.
Sasha, remember how I used to prank-call that hotline and pretend I wanted to commit suicide?
Yeah.
Do you remember the number?
No.
Lexa, wait, I don't like saying this and I may regret it, but do you want to talk to us?
I watched porn.
Go to the attic.
I'll try to find that number, maybe someone there will listen to me.
No, wait, just wait.
Was there a guy in it that you liked?
There was a guy dressed as a dog.
Go to the attic.
And there was a woman.
And that woman was our mom.
Lexa, how can you say that?
Sasha, don't be ridiculous.
You know Lexa.
God knows what he saw.
See for yourself then.
Give it here.
Want to see what's in my tool belt?
Woof, woof, woof.
I just don't get it.
How can guys watch this stuff?
These women are like pieces of meat.
Don't talk about my mom like that.
Sorry.
Now here it comes.
Iva, what is the meaning of this?
But this isn't at all what you think.
Oh sure, it's completely different, right?
My own daughter is here watching porn with the gang from next door.
And Sasha, you're singing along for him?
That guy is literally dressed as a dog.
Simona!
Oh, so you're watching Bergman too, huh?
Don't joke around.
This is serious.
How are these poor kids going to look their own mother in the eye now?
You shouldn't have shown it to them then.
Bergman isn't for kids.
Hi there.
So, kids, where are you?
I come home in the evening and two important things are missing.
A sleeping bag and an alarm clock.
I got held up at work.
I was starting to think the repairman would never pull that hose out.
Why is everyone acting like they've seen a ghost?
Of course.
Lexa did something again.
No, not Lexa.
Then who did what?
Well, Simona, I...
Look, it's really none of my business, right, but...
Stop stammering and tell me what's going on.
Lexa saw you.
Actually, we all saw you in this kind of movie.
In Bergman?
You'd better see for yourself.
Let's go.
Where are you going?
To the attic.
In the role of the dark huntsman, role in full.
Come on, come on.
So you really think your mommy would act in something like this?
I see.
Wouldn't you rather I tell you what I saw at the movies yesterday?
Sex and the City.
I think it could've been rated for all audiences.
Dad, stop.
I admit I don't pay enough attention to you.
I last saw Lexa here on Tuesday when he came to show me at the Jezevec how nicely they embroidered him.
That was me, Mom.
Fine, I have seen Lexa recently too.
I know, last Christmas wasn't great.
You had to tap beer all night.
I also understand you'd like to have something other than yesterday's leftovers for breakfast sometimes.
Fine, I'm not an ideal mother.
But this?
Not that I haven't had offers, before you ruined my figure, but I have my limits.
Really?
Did any of you actually watch it to the end?
Well, yeah.
At the end, everyone meets at the lord's castle and then the dark huntsman comes, right, and pulls out his...
Read it.
Lexa.
So, Sasha?
1980.
How old was I then?
I was ten.
Wow, but she looked older.
Ozzak.
So it wasn't you?
Mom, this is great, because now, you're here with us, you notice us, and I...
Imagine, Mom, for the first time I managed to outrun the fourth graders and they only beat me up a little, and you're listening to me, Mom.
Easy now, easy.
We only hug when the Jezevec has a good take.
Thanks, Mom.
Now I can make up for what I've missed.
Slow down, wild one.
I haven't seen those five porn films yet.
Hold on.
First check if there's nothing objectionable in those porn tapes.
Yeah, this one's American, you can watch that right away.
And he lent it.
This is no Cries and Whispers.
What would it be then?
I have absolutely no idea what to call it.
There are completely naked people here.
Marcelka, like I said, you have to fast-forward the boring scenes.
But what did you think of the story?
The story?
Yeah.
You mean the part where three new colleagues come to the fire station?
And they call that job interviews?
Nobody was talking there.
Exactly.
Short, simple, to the bone.
So what's the problem?
Actually, there was no problem at all.
Zoran actually didn't fall asleep, and neither did I.
He sends you this.
And I have something for you too.
It's Bergman.
An absolute classic.
The Seventh Seal.
You'll love it.
It's in the original language.
And now if you'll excuse me.
I have some work in the back.
Good night.
Mom, well this is just great.
Well, here we go.
You really got me in trouble.
What?
Please, can you at least tell me which of those films you were in?
What?
How can you not remember?
Oh well, I'll read you the titles and you tell me, okay?
The Wizard of Oz, Hotel Wet Star, not that one, right?
Foreskin on a Hot Tin Roof, Twelve Unfinished Men, Jesus Christ, that must've been intense, Three Loins for Cinderella.
That one too?
Thirty Thrusts of Major Zeman.
Yeah.
Circus Humberto?
Mom, how would I know if there were bears in it?